Nothing Like A Fairy Tale
by angel of evil
Summary: Ginny wished her life was a fairy tale. Which was bad. Because it came true. Because it made the wrong person Prince Charming. Because the guy she loves is being forced to marry. Because she will be forced to marry unless she can do something about it. HG
1. When You Wish Upon A Star

THIS STORY CONTAINS HBP SPOILERS! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Hello people! I'm finally writing a story again! I'm so proud of myself! Well, maybe I shouldn't be so proud. I mean, I'm ignoring my homework right now. Who gives homework on the weekend anyway? I know I'm in trouble in school. But, the Constitution forbids cruel and unusual punishment! Doesn't homework on the weekend count? I'm grounded anyway, isn't that enough punishment? Well, actualy it isn't because I'm having fun writing right now! I should shut up about this now, shouldn't I? I'll decide later if I'm doing anything wrong.

Disclaimer: I own it all! Wait. NO! IT WAS ANOTHER OF MY MINDLESS RANTINGS! I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER! WHY MUST MY MIND PLAY TRICKS ON ME?

Anyway. Time for the story.

* * *

"It's a Muggle thing, Ginny!" 

"But, it makes no sense whatsoever! Hermione, do you honestly think wishing on a bloody star will..."

"Why did I even bring this up!" Hermione interupted.

I ignored her. "You do believe in it, don't you?"

"I tried it when I was little and the wish came true," Hermione said.

"The wish came true?" I repeated. "I gotta try that!"

With that, I ran up to my room, slamming the door behind me.

"Ginerva Molly Weasley!" screamed my mom.

But I didn't listen to her. I was lost in thought. Thinking what to wish for. I could stop Bill and Phelgm's wedding. I could get revenge on anyone. But, it would be cruel to stop the wedding. And I can get revenge on anyone without wishing for it.

What was the one thing I wanted and couldn't have?

Harry.

Yes. Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Chosen One, the Dark Lord's worst enemy. _That_ Harry. I'm not some crazed, psyco fan or anything like that. I even went out with him last year. Wait, that makes it look like I'm a crazed, psyco fan. But, just to set the record straight, I am NOT a crazed, psyco fan of the Boy-Who-Lived.

He stopped going out with me for my safety. Apparently, he couldn't care less about my happiness.

That would explain why I did it. Made a wish, I mean.

And a horrible one, at that.

The first star of the night appeared. And I said, "I wish my life was like that Muggle fairy tale Cinderella or whatever it's called, except without all the misery and without the step-family."

WHY! Why was I born so stupid? I could have said "I wish Harry would realize we're perfect for each other" or something like that. But, no! I have to make the most idiotic wish in the history of the earth. I don't even want to be Cinderella!

Wait. What happened to Cinderella again? Was she the one who ate a poisoned apple and went into a deep sleep and a prince kissed her and she woke up and lived happily ever after? Or was she the one that pissed off a fairy and got cursed and fell into a deep sleep and a prince kissed her and she woke up and lived happily ever after?

Maybe this won't be so bad. They all live happily ever after.

Oh, I know who Cinderella is now. She's the one that got mistreated by her step-family and went to a ball she wasn't allowed to go to and had Prince Charming fall in love with her and ran away and had the Prince find her and married Prince Charming and lived happily ever after. Okay, there's no misery for me and no step-family. This won't be that bad at all. But, I have I feeling I'm forgeting something about Cinderella.

Oh, God. I didn't say I wanted Harry to be Prince Charming! What if my Prince Charming turns out to be Draco Malfoy!

I'm doomed.


	2. I Hate The Ministry

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

On with the story!

* * *

"Hermione, have you seen... Hermione! What the bloody hell are you doing?" 

"Go away, Ginny," said Hermione.

"You're KISSING my BROTHER! What is wrong with this picture?"

"The only thing wrong with this picture is that you're in it, Ginny," said Ron.

"Ron!"

"Sorry, Hermione."

"You should say sorry to Ginny."

"Why?"

"Because."

"That's not an answer."

"Yes, it is. Now tell Ginny you're sorry."

"Do I have to?"

"Yes."

"I didn't do anything."

"Yes, you did. Now, say you're sorry."

"Sorry, Ginny."

I don't blame him for backing down. It sounded like Hermione wanted to kill him.

"Good. Ginny, what were you saying when you walked in?"

"I don't know. Are you two a couple?"

Hermione turned pink. Which is strange because she didn't turn pink when I saw them kissing. "Yes."

"Mum is going to be so happy," I said.

Ron walked out of the room.

"So anyway, Ginny. Did you hear the big news?"

"What? You're pregnant?"

"GINNY!"

"What?"

"Be serious."

"I was being serious."

"No, you weren't. Anyway, the Ministry has decided to have princes in the wizarding world."

"And I should care why?"

"Because you know both of them."

"What? The Ministry picked people from Hogwarts?"

"Actually, Ginny, they did."

"Who?"

"You're not going to like this. Harry and..."

Maybe Harry really is Prince Charming!

"...Draco Malfoy," Hermione finished.

"WHAT!"

"I told you that you wouldn't like it."

"What moron picked Malfoy?"

"A moron by the name of Dolores Jane Umbridge," Hermione said bitterly.

"Oh. Maybe she's a Death Eater."

"You haven't heard the worst of it yet."

"There's more?"

"The Ministry is forcing the princes to marry in a week. They're holding a ball. All the witches in England between 16 and 20 are invited."

"When's the ball?"

"Tommorow."

"Hermione, what happens if the princes don't pick someone to marry at the ball?"

"The Ministry is going to pick someone for them to marry if they don't pick."

"D'you know who they'll force Harry to marry?"

"Cho."

CHO? CHO CHANG? NO! THIS CAN NOT BE HAPPENING! THE MINISTRY IS GOING TO FORCE HARRY TO MARRY CHO CHANG! CHO CHANG, WHO IS A TOTAL BITCH! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD WE LIVE IN? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE MINISTRY?

You know what? This must be punishment for something I did. That must be it. I did something bad to someone and now someone is doing something bad to me. Okay. If that's the way it is, I can handle it. I'm fine. Perfect, in fact. Never been better. There's just one thing that I have to say.

WHOEVER IS DOING THIS HAS RUINED MY LIFE!

Other than that, I'm fine with Harry marrying Cho. I mean, my life will suck and Harry's will too. But, what's the big deal? My life already sucks. And-

Who am I kidding? I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS!

And then Hermione said, "You haven't heard the worst of it yet."

What could be worse?

"What's worse than Harry marrying Cho Chang?" I asked.

"They're forcing you to marry Malfoy."

And I thought it was bad before?


	3. Things Get Worse

I'm really sorry that I didn't thank the reviewers of the first chapter! So the reviewers from the first chapter are **Rubber-duckiesofdoom**, **Pussin Boots**, **Schatje**, **Emma333**, and **clumsyfaery**. Thank you so much for reviewing!

And thanks to the reviewers of my last chapter!

**Pussin Boots**: Ron is not freaking out because he doesn't know yet, which I think I explain in this chapter. Hopefully.

**Emma333**: Hi Maddy. Thanks for reviewing. Thanks for the compliments about my story too.

**Rubber-duckiesofdoom**: THIS IS NOT A FANFIC WHERE GINNY FALLS IN LOVE WITH MALFOY! I hate stories like that.

Disclaimer: I had a dream that it was all mine. But, sadly, that dream is not reality and I am very pissed off about that. Because reality sucks!

On with the story!

* * *

"Very funny, Hermione." 

"I'm serious! The Ministry is forcing you to marry Malfoy!"

No, they're not. They can't.

Who am I kidding? They can and they will.

The Ministry is way too powerful.

We should have that thing that Hermione once said the United States has. According to her, the U.S. has a way to make sure that the goverment doesn't become too powerful.

The Ministry needs that. Whatever it is.

Americans are so lucky.

"What are you talking about, Ginny?" asked Hermione.

Damn. I think I said that last part out loud.

"Don't swear, Ginny."

I have got to stop thinking out loud.

Hermione looked like she was going to laugh. Which I don't get. What's so funny?

"You're right, Ginny. You have to stop thinking out loud."

Damn. I did it again.

"What were you saying about the Americans?" Hermione asked.

"They are so lucky. Their goverment can't force them to marry the spawn of Satan."

Lucky me. Ron picked that moment to walk pass the room.

"Who's being forced to marry Snape?"

"Ron, Snape is Satan," I said. "We're talking about his illegitimate son, Draco Malfoy."

"What makes you think Malfoy is Snape's illegitimate son?" Hermione asked, raising an eyebrow.

I just realized that Hermione asks way too many questions. Questions that I don't have an answer for.

"Um. Malfoy looks nothing like his dad?" I said.

"Ginny, Malfoy looks exactly like his dad," Hermione said.

Dammit.

"Well, Snape is Satan. And Malfoy is the spawn of Satan. So, Malfoy has to be Snape's son!"

"Ginny, even I can tell how stupid that is," Ron said.

Bloody hell. Hermione did something to Ron. Because that's the first time he has ever insulted himself.

Or maybe he's just so stupid that he didn't realize that he said that.

"Look who's talking, Ginny."

Damn. I was thinking out loud again.

"Ginny, don't swear."

I have got to stop doing that.

"Yes, you do," said Ron.

Damn. Double damn. Is there even such a thing as a double damn?

"So, anyway, who's being forced to marry Malfoy?" Ron asked.

"You didn't tell him?" I asked Hermione.

"Well, it seemed like a good idea to tell you first. Because when he finds out..."

We all know what will happen. Ron will freak and tell all my brothers. All six of them will then threaten Malfoy with disembowlment. And then, Malfoy will find a bride with less overprotective relatives.

Actually, that's not a bad idea.

"Hermione, how do you even know this stuff?" I asked.

"Well, I woke up at four..."

Why would anyone wake up at such an ungodly hour? I mean, Voldemort could attack at four in the morning and I would sleep right through it.

"...Because I heard something at the window. It was an owl from the Ministry."

I would have ignored it and went back to sleep.

Hermione handed me a letter.

Ron stood there, staring at us, his brain working hard to figure out what was going on.

I always knew he was a bit slow.

I don't want to read the letter.

I guess I have to.

_Dear Miss Ginerva Molly Weasley,_

They used my full name. How could they? Don't they know how much I hate that name?

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected to marry His Royal Highness, Prince Draco Lucius Malfoy._ _However, the marriage will only take place if His Royal Highness, Prince Draco Lucius Malfoy can not find another bride._

Why do they keep saying his full title over and over? We heard it once, we don't need to hear it again! And when did that whole 'His Royal Highness' crap ever seem like a good idea? And it's so repetative. His Royal Highness this, His Royal Highness that. When are they going to learn that I don't care?

The next time I see Malfoy, I fully intend to call him 'Ferret Face' just to mess with their heads.

'His Royal Highness, the amazing bouncing ferret' would be good, too.

_His Royal Highness, Prince Draco Lucius Malfoy and His Royal Highness, Heir to the Throne, Prince Harry James Potter are holding a ball this evening._

Wait. What throne? Why didn't anybody tell me Harry is going to be king?

WHY DO WE EVEN NEED A KING?

_You are required to attend the ball._

I'm required to attend the ball? This sucks.

_Sincerly,  
Rufus Scrimgeour  
Minister of Magic_

Hey, that's only one person. Why does the letter say 'we'. Scrimgeour thinks too highly of himself, if you ask me.

Oh well, I have more important things to worry about.

Like how to get Malfoy to fall in love with someone at a ball tonight.

Like where to get a dress for said ball.

Like why wishing on a star ever seemed like a good idea to me.

Well, in my world, solving everyday problems is easy. Because I have one simple rule that I live by.

When in doubt, ask Hermione.

True, this isn't an everyday problem. But, Hermione will know what to do.

Won't she?

Only one way to find out.

"Hermione, what do I do now?"

"Well, you have four opinions. You can elope with someone right now, get Malfoy to fall in love with someone else, act so replusive that Malfoy picks someone just so that he won't have to marry you, or marry Malfoy."

Ron finally understood what we were talkng about.

I'm not going to tell you what happened next. But, let's just say that it wasn't pretty.

And I thought I swore a lot.

When we got Ron calmed down, I decided to go up to my room and take a nap.

But, when I got there, someone else was sitting on my bed.

Two people, in fact.

Lily and James Potter.

* * *

PLEASE REVIEW! 

Reviews will help me update quicker.

Oh, a few things before I go.

-I don't think Malfoy's middle name is actually Lucius. I just picked it because it's his dad's name. And the name Lucius comes from the name Lucifer. Lucifer is another name for the Devil. So, Malfoy's middle name being Lucius would support my whole spawn of Satan thing.

-Ginny is not crazy. Lily and James Potter are actually there. They're just not alive.

-THIS IS A HARRY/GINNY FANFIC!

Please review!

-Jessi


	4. Lily And James Potter

Disclaimer: Not mine…  
Still not mine…  
Damn. It's still not mine!

**hopelessromantic1234**: Don't worry. Harry and Ginny are gonna get together sooner or later. Actually, they're gonna get together later. After I accidentally-on-purpose ruin their lives and then fix everything. Thanks for reviewing.

**Rubber-duckiesofdoom**: You'll find out why Lily and James are there in this chapter. Thanks for reviewing.

**Malda the magic whisperer**: Cool name. Thanks for reviewing. Glad you liked my story.

**Pussin Boots**: I'm glad I remembered to put that into the story. Thanks for reviewing.

**Maddy**: Thanks for reviewing. The whole spawn of Satan thing is from my life. I told my friends that one of my teachers was Satan in disguise. I also told them that Tommy is the spawn of Satan. Then, I said that Tommy was the teacher's illegitimate son. I explained it the same way Ginny did. My friends didn't say anything though. It could be because they are used to my mindless ramblings. But, it's probably because I have a fiery temper and they know it. Most people I've met know better than to piss me off.

And now for the story.

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I'm sorry. I just had to do that!

* * *

I'm not crazy. Lily and James Potter really were there. 

And they looked solid.

Today has not been my day.

I mean, really. How much is a girl supposed to put up in a single day anyway? I am being forced to marry the spawn of Satan! The guy I love is being forced to marry a total bitch! I was scarred for life at the sight of my brother snogging his best friend! I found out I'm going to have to be a princess! I'M BEING FORCED TO MARRY!

And if that wasn't bad enough, Lily and James Potter appear in my bedroom.

I bet you're wondering what I did.

I screamed.

Well, what would you have done? Imagine you walk into your room and there are people sitting on your bed. People you have never met.

It wouldn't be so bad if they weren't dead!

It doesn't help that I'm in love with their son.

"You're in love with Harry?" asked Lily with wide eyes.

Damn. Thinking loud again.

To avoid answering the question, I screamed again. Louder this time.

"Shut up, Ginny!" yelled Ron from his room. "My problems are worse than yours!"

Stupid git. Thinks everything is about him.

"Answer the question, Ginny," Lily said.

Damn.

Lily and James spoke at the same time.

"Don't swear," Lily said.

James said, "I like you already!"

Lily shot him a dirty look. "_James_," she said in a really scary voice.

I started to back away from her. James, on the other hand, laughed. Just laughed. If I didn't know who she was, I would have said that she was evil. So James was practically staring evil in the face and he was LAUGHING!

Okay, okay. I know Lily's not evil. But, she sounded like she was.

Then, she turned on me. "_Answer my question_," she said in the scary voice.

"Um..."

Yes. The answer to her question is yes. I love Harry Potter.

"You do?" asked James.

What is with me and thinking out loud?

Now I have something else to add to my list of horrible things that happened today. I found out that I love Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Chosen One, the Prince of the Wizarding World, the heir to some throne that I've never heard of, and whatever other stupid titles he has. That would be bad all by itself, considering that he will never love me back. But, I found a way to make it worse. I accidentally told his parents! His dead parents!

How can today get any worse?

"Well, you could die," James said.

Great. I was thinking out loud again.

Why don't I just tell the world all my secrets? I'm probably going to blurt them out anyway.

"If you tell the world your secrets, everyone will know. But if you blurt them out, only a few people will know," said Lily.

"Can I ask you guys a question?" I asked.

"Sure," Lily said.

"Do you guys ever think out loud?"

They looked surprized. They must of thought I was going to ask why they were here. Now that I think about it, that is a very good question. Why are they in my room?

"I don't think we do. Why?" said James.

"Because I keep thinking out loud and I don't even realize it until someone says something," I answered.

"We can't help you with that," Lily said. "Sorry."

"Well, why are you here?"

"You don't know?" asked Lily.

So they weren't expecting me to ask them that.

"Of course I don't know why you're here!" I answered.

"Well, you should know why we're here," James said. "It's all your fault."

Lily shot James a dirty look.

Why would it be all my fault that they're here? It's not like I asked them to come.

Oh, shit. That wish! Why am I so stupid? Except for Hermione and Ron snogging, everything horrible that happened today was all my fault! The wish made Harry and Malfoy princes. The wish is trying to make me a princess! Malfoy is Prince Charming.

I am so dead.

So I screamed again.

Ron ran into my room. "I told you to shut up, Ginny! Not everything is about you!"

Prat.

"You're the one that thinks everything is about you!" I said. "I'm the one that has to marry Malfoy!"

"WHAT!" screamed someone from the hall.

Actually, that sounded more like two people. Isn't that just great? I've told Fred and George.

"Ginny!" said Fred. "Why are you..."

"...Going to marry Malfoy!" finished George.

"IT'S NOT LIKE I WANT TO MARRY HIM!" I yelled.

Great. Why don't I just owl everyone in the world and tell them I have to marry Malfoy?

"Could you say that a little louder, Gin? I think there are some people in China that didn't hear you."

"Shut up, Harry," I said.

Wait. It's Harry! What is he doing here!

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I'm visiting for the summer, remember?"

"But, you're a prince now. Shouldn't you be doing something... boring?"

Harry laughed. I made him laugh!

"You made him laugh, Ginny!" Ron said. "He didn't even smile the whole time we were talking to him!"

I feel special.

"All of you get out of my room," I said.

"Why, Ginnikins?" asked Fred.

"Yeah, we were having so much fun," said George.

"Why don't you all go and think of ways to kill Ferret Face?" I suggested.

"Great name for your finacee," Harry said.

"Shut up," I answered. "Just find a way to kill him without getting into too much trouble."

Harry laughed again. "Nice to know you haven't changed at all, Gin."

Then, they finally left.

And I realized that no one saw Lily and James but me.

Which proves that I'm going crazy.

"You're not going crazy, Ginny," Lily said. "We're invisible to everyone but you."

"Why?"

"Because we're you're fairy godparents," said James in a bored voice.

I screamed again, just to let out my anger.

And Harry, Ron, Fred, and George came into my room.

"What's wrong, Gin?" asked Harry.

"EVERYTHING!" I yelled. "Now get out of my room!"

And then they all ran from my room.

Except Harry.

"You're not gonna have to marry him, Gin," he said.

And then he left.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM! WHY DOES HE HAVE TO GO AWAY RIGHT AFTER HE TELLS ME SOMETHING IMPORTANT LIKE THAT?

Boys are all prats.

* * *

I'm really sorry that I didn't update sooner! 

PLEASE REVIEW!

-Jessi


	5. Off To The Ministry

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Thanks to everyone that reviewed: **Rubber-duckiesofdoom**, Maddy, Reader, marz, luckycharms445, **Anodicas**, pinkprincess, **princess 4 a day**, and **Imperial Princess**.

And now for the story.

* * *

"I'm not a prat!" said James. 

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?

Lily and James started to argue.

Lily said, "You are a prat, James!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

It continued like this for half an hour. It would have continued longer, but an owl was at my window.

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am n-- Hey, look! An owl!"

It was like he never saw an owl before.

"Lily! Look! It's an owl! AN OWL!"

I went to my window and took the letter from the owl. It was from the Ministry.

How are they going to ruin my life now?

_Dear Miss Ginerva Molly Weasley,_

I am so gonna kill whoever writes these letters.

_We regret to inform you that there has been an assasination attempt on His Royal Highness, Prince Draco_ _Lucius Malfoy._

Maybe he died! That would solve all my problems!

_However, we are also pleased to inform you that the attempt has failed._

NOOOOO!

_His Royal Highness, Prince Draco Lucius Malfoy has decided that you will decide the would-be assasins fate. Their names are as follows: William Weasley, Charles Weasley, Fredrick Weasley, George Weasley, Ronald Weasley, and..._

My brothers are getting a medal for trying to kill Malfoy.

_...His Royal Highness, Prince Harry James Potter._

_The six are being held in jail until you decide what to do. _

_Sincerly,_

_The Minister of Magic,_

_Rufus Scrimegeor_

Dammit.

"What's wrong?" asked Lily.

"Harry and five of my brothers are being held in jail for attemptting to kill Malfoy and I have to decide what to do with them."

"That's not so bad," said James.

"No," I agreed. "The bad part is that they failed."

Lily rolled her eyes. Then, she said, "You two would make a wonderful couple, you know."

"What?"

"You and Harry," she said. "He loves you a lot."

Okay, someone must have put firewhiskey in my pumpkin juice this morning. A lot of firewhiskey. Because I am definitely delusional right now. There is no way Harry loves me.

James must have thought so too because he said, "What the bloody hell are you talking about?"

I decided that it would be best if I pretended we never had this conversation. So I marched into the kitchen. Hermione was sitting at the table, reading. Guess what book. Yep, it was none other than _Hogwarts, A History._

Hasn't she memorized that book?

"C'mon," I told her. "We're going to the Ministry."

"Why?" she said.

"Because your boyfriend got arrested."

Hermione looked like she was going to murder someone. "Why did he get arrested?"

"Because he decided it would be nice to try to assasinate Ferret-Face."

"Are you ever going to let that go?"

"When hell freezes over. Now let's go."

When we got to the Ministry, there were a lot of reporters. I mean, a lot. There were, like, a thousand of them. All from the same newspaper. Don't they have anything better to do?

Actually, what's more interesting than an assasination attempt?

"There was an assasination attempt?" said the reporter nearest to me. "We're here for the annual magic cheese event."

I'm not even gonna ask.

I went up to the guy at that desk by the entrance. "D'you know where my brothers are?"

"Who are your brothers?"

"Forget it. D'you know where Harry is?"

"Harry Potter?"

"Yes."

"Then, tell me."

"I'm only allowed to tell..." He checked a piece of parchment. "...A Miss Weasley."

"I'm Ginny."

"Then, I can't tell you."

I hate this guy. He's gonna make me say my full name. Well, might as well get it over with. "My full name is Ginerva Molly Weasley."

He started to laugh. He stopped when I glared at him. "What was your mum thinking when she named you? You should get your name legally changed. I'll bring you to the jail cell."

The jail cell is in the Ministry? Since when do they have jail cells in the Ministry?

"Ever since they ran out of room in Azkaban."

We got to the jail cell. Harry, Fred, George, Bill, and Charlie were laughing. Ron looked embarassed. Harry stopped laughing long enough to say hello to me and Hermione.

"Hey, Gin. Hey, Hermione."

"Hey, Harry." I turned to the guards. "Let them go now."

"Are you sure?"

"I can make decisions, you know. Now let them go."

The guards let them go. They were all laughing. Except for Ron. He looked like he wanted to die of embarassment.

"What did I tell you about not getting into trouble?" I asked.

Ron started to laugh. Great. Now all six boys were laughing.

Then, Ferret-Face himself appeared.

"Sweetheart!" he yelled.

Someone is having a cruel laugh at my expense.

At least Harry stopped laughing. Was it just my imagination or did he look like he wanted to kill Malfoy?

It probably was my imagination.

Or maybe he did want to kill Malfoy. Maybe he loves me like a sister or something.

But, if that was true, he would be laughing along with my brothers.

Maybe he really does love me.

Yeah, when pigs fly.

"When pigs fly what?" asked Harry.

Damn. Thinking out loud again.

Malfoy ran to hug me. My brothers stopped laughing. I pulled out my wand. "Take another step and I'll hex you into next week."

I meant every word, but he seemed to think I was kidding. He kept coming towards me, so I hexed him.

In front of the guards.

Who disarmed me and took the hex off Malfoy.

The boys started to laugh again.

"Miss Weasley, we're afraid we're going to have to place you under arrest," said one of the guards.

Damn.

"You're not going to arrest her," Harry said.

"But, she committed a crime, Your Highness. We need to see that she is punished."

What is with all this Your Highness crap?

"Let her go," Harry said.

The guards gave in. Probably because Harry is crown prince and all that.

We went back to the Burrow. I was about to run up to my room, but Harry stopped me.

"Pigs can fly if you charm them to."

Well, that was random. I wonder what he would have said if he knew why I said 'when pigs fly'.

* * *

I'm finally finished with this chapter! 

Please review! Just click on that little blue button over there! Or is that button purple? Or a mixture of purple and blue? Whatever. Just click on it!

-Jessi


	6. Operation: Make Malfoy Hate Me

Disclaimer: Not mine! Don't sue! Not that you'd get much if you did sue. I've already blown most of my money on soda to keep me awake during class. The only thing I have of value is my computer and if you can sue me for writing Harry Potter fanfiction, you can obviously afford a much faster computer.

Thanks to all my reviewers! I'd write indiviual responses, but its not allowed anymore. So now I can only give a review response if you're logged in when you review. So if you have an account, please log in!

I'm really sorry for the late update. I had writer's block. DAMN WRITER'S BLOCK!

This chapter is really random and really short. I'm sorry, but I have midterms to study for. It's also very strange. Even I think so. But I kinda crashed from all the sugar I had today: a Pop-Tart, two sodas, a really big cookie, four big chocolate covered pretzels, and an ice cream sandwich. It probably sucks, but I'm too tired to care.

Happy holidays, people!

* * *

I was still thinking about what Harry had said. I mean, its not everyday the guy you like admits he loves you. 

Well, okay, he didn't admit that he loved me. He told me that pigs can fly if you charm them to.

Merlin, that sounds so stupid when I say it. It's also confusing the hell out of me. Either he just randomly told me something I should have known in the first place or he heard everything I said when my mouth and brain worked together to ruin my life.

God, my life sucks. Even my brain is out to get me.

Lily didn't seem to care.

"We need to form a plan for the ball tonight," she said.

"A plan?" I asked. I had no idea what she was talking about. It's a ball. And if you forget the fact that the ball will ruin my life, it's not important.

Besides, if we have a plan, I'll just screw it up. A plan is not gonna help me at all. In fact, a plan will probably make my life worse. If that's possible.

"Why does she need a plan?" asked James. He seemed just as confused as me. Maybe even more confused.

"A plan to get Ferret-Face to hate Ginny!"

Cool. She called him Ferret-Face.

"I mean Malfoy," she said.

It it a good idea though. It's very hard to screw that up. I'll just act normal. Threaten him, use a Bat-Bogey Hex, set my brothers on him. And even if I do screw up, he can't love me anymore than he already does.

I think.

It's worth a shot though.

"Operation: Make Malfoy Hate Me beigns," I said. "Any ideas?"

"Ohh, ohh! Pick me, pick me!" screamed James.

"What?" asked Lily. She looked like she already knew the answer.

"PUNCH HIM!" he yelled gleefully.

"Violence is not the answer to everything, James!" said Lily. And judging by her face, she had obviously had this conversation one to many times before. She looked like she wanted to hit him. Isn't that ironic? She was telling him not to use violence when she was seconds away from punching him.

James, on the other hand, looked very disappointed. "It's not?" he asked sadly.

"No. It's not."

"Okay," he said. Then he smiled. "Imaturity is the answer to everything!"

"No. It's not."

"Yes, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is!" James yelled. He sounded like a little kid having a temper tantrum. I am so glad I am the only one who can see and hear them.

"Fine!" Lily said. "Imaturity is the answer to everything!"

"Told ya."

Lily punched him in the arm.

James pretended to look shocked. "Lil, I thought violence wasn't the answer!"

Lily stared at him for a second. Then, she started to laugh. Which was a relief, since she was either going to kill him or laugh. And I didn't want to witness the death of James Potter.

Well, not death, since he's technically already dead.

Then, for reasons completely unknown to me, they started to snog.

And I thought my life couldn't get any worse. No, now I'm forced to watch Harry's dead parents snog. I mean, if that's the way they end all their arguements, they can go right ahead and do that. But they don't have to do that IN FRONT OF ME!

EW!

I need something to gorge my eyes out with.

Maybe I could use my wand. Or that quill over there. It looks nice and sharp. Or...

Okay, now I have to say something. Because now I can hear them!

"Um, have you two forgotten the small little insignifigant fact that I am STILL HERE?"

"Sorry," said Lily.

Sorry? That is all she has to say to me? She has scarred me for life and all she can say is sorry?

I hate them.

Why don't I just marry Malfoy? That would get rid of them.

I think.

Probably not.

Actually, I'd probably just be sentencing myself to a life of misery. Malfoy on one side of me with Lily and James standing behind me trying to make my "happily-ever after" come true.

"Ginny, if you're going to think out loud, at least say everything you're thinking so we don't just hear fragments?" said James.

What the hell is wrong with me? Am I some freak of nature? Or is fate just trying to see how long it takes for me to crack?

Well, if that's what fate is trying to do, it's doing a pretty damn good job so far.

"Don't swear, Gin," said a voice from behind me.

WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?

"Gin, if you're gonna swear, don't do it that loud. Your mum'll kill you," the voice said.

Stupid voice. Leave me alone to wallow in self-pity.

"Gin, you do realize that I'm not a disembodied voice or a figment of your imagination, right?"

I turned around. The stupid voice belonged to Harry. So Harry should just leave me alone to wallow in self-pity.

Or maybe he can help me.

"Hey, Harry. How can I get Malfoy to hate me?"

"Punch him!" he yelled gleefully.

Like father, like son.

I guess it would work though. And it would be fun.

Guess I'm gonna punch him. I wonder if it'll work.

Operation: Make Malfoy Hate Me is off to a good start.

* * *

Please review and make a girl who's going to fail her midterms happy. 

-Jessi


	7. The Ball

Disclaimer: I don't own it. It's a good thing I don't believe in Santa or I might have asked to own Harry Potter. I can just imagine it: "Why don't I own Harry Potter? I've been very good this year!"

Thanks to all my reviewers! Anonomus reviewers:

**confusedegg**: Turning Malfoy's hair red and gold is an awesome idea!

**luckycharms445**: She will punch Malfoy sooner or later. And I have no idea why Ginny thinks out loud all the time either. I wish I knew what's wrong with her.

**Maddy**: Don't worry. She'll punch Malfoy REALLY hard!

**pinkprincess**: Updating now.

This chapter uses some words that I think are totally American. I have no idea if they use them in England. I don't think they do. It's kinda hard to picture anyone from the Harry Potter books saying things like "whatever", "duh", and "dude". I'm sorry if they don't use those words in England. But you can't blame me. I'm an American. That makes my writing totally American too.

* * *

"I've got an idea," Lily said. 

"What?" I asked.

"Who are you talking to, Gin?" asked Harry.

Damn. He's still here.

"Leave me alone."

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I want to wallow in my own self-pity."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

Finally. He left. But not before I talked to the fairy godparents that he can't see while he was standing there.

Great. Now he probably thinks I'm crazy.

I probably am. Two dead people appear in my room, claiming to be my fairy godparents, when they're actually the parents of the most famous wizard in the world, and I'm the only one that can see or hear them.

If that's not crazy, I don't know what is.

"Here's what you do," Lily said. "You go to the ball looking raggedy and poor and dirty. And you don't have a mask. After a little while, you make up some excuse and leave. Then, we make you look rich and beautiful and give you a mask. Malfoy is shallow, he'll fall in love with the mysterious girl wearing a mask and look for her for the rest of his life. That will leave you free to marry Harry. And by the time Malfoy realizes that you're the mysterious girl, you'll be married."

Lily is a genius.

"I know I am," Lily said. "And you should really stop thinking out loud."

"Looks like James has been rubbing off on you."

"Shut up."

Oh shit! I have an hour until the ball starts!

"Just find the ugliest dress robes ever invented," Lily said.

The ugliest dress robes ever invented? Looks like I'll be paying a visit to my dear brother Ron.

Nah. I'm too lazy. He can come to me.

So I screamed again.

Ron and Harry came running in.

"What?" said Ron.

"Ron, remember those dress robes you needed for the Yule Ball in your fourth year?"

Harry started laughing at the memory.

"Shut up, Harry. What about them?"

"I need to wear them to the ball tonight."

Harry started crying, he was laughing so hard.

"What? Why?" asked Ron.

"I figure that if I look really ugly and poor, Malfoy won't want anything to do with me."

Harry went to Ron's room without a word, which was to be expected since he was still laughing so hard. He came back after a few seconds with the robe. He had finally stopped laughing.

"Here you go, Gin."

They left my room and I got dressed for the ball.

I'm proud to say that I looked horrible when I was done.

There is no way Malfoy could like me now!

The Ministry sent a carriage for me. It was orange. Why orange? Are they making fun of my hair? Because my hair is sort of a mixture of red and orange.

Someone is obviously making fun of me.

I got to the ball. I was a half an hour early, but the place was packed. It was filled with witches trying to win the heart of Harry, Malfoy, or both.

But if you listen to Lily, they both want me.

I feel so special.

Not.

Some dude asked me, "What's your name, miss?"

"Why?"

"So we can announce you, of course."

"Ginny Weasley."

"Full name, please."

I hate this guy.

"Ginerva Molly Weasley."

He turned and announced me.

_Well, duh. Of course he announced you. That's why he wanted your name in the first place._

Who said that?

_I'm your subconcous. Duh._

Great. Now my subconcous is mocking me.

Malfoy came running to meet me.

Then he stopped suddenly.

"Who the hell are you?" he asked.

"Now, now, ferret. Mind your language."

"You're not Ginny."

"I think I would know whether or not I'm Ginny."

"But you're ugly."

I knew I was. But you don't let your worst enemy get away with that kind of remark.

So I punched him.

Hard.

"OWWW!" he screamed.

That felt good.

"Have you learned your lesson now? Never call a girl ugly."

"But you are ugly!"

He just doesn't get it, does he?

I punched him again.

Harder.

Right in the middle of that face he's so proud of.

Blood started pouring from his nose.

And instead of screaming 'ow' like a normal person, he screamed, "MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!"

I couldn't resist ruining the hair he loves too.

So I took out my wand and turned his hair red and gold.

Gryffindor colors!

"See ya, Ferret-Face," I said.

I walked away and right into Harry.

Literally.

"Ow, my head," I said.

"What'd you do to Malfoy?"

"Punched him in the stomach, punched him in his face, and turned his hair red and gold."

Harry smiled. "Gryffindor colors!"

"Exactly. He should notice it any second now."

As soon as I said that, Malfoy screamed, "MY HAIR! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!"

"I'm guessing he said the same thing about his face?" Harry said.

"Yep."

The music started. All the girls started running towards either Harry or Malfoy.

"Hey, Gin. Wanna dance with me?" Harry asked.

"Sure."

Most of the girls gave me dirty looks. I laughed and stuck my tongue out at them.

The song ended. The girls started running towards Harry again.

Harry took one look at them and said, "Hey, Gin. Wanna dance with me again?"

"Is Harry Potter scared of a bunch of girls?"

"Do you see how many of them there are?" he asked.

"Point taken."

The girls all gave me dirty looks again.

But during the song, some of them gave me even more dirty looks.

Why?

Because they heard what Harry said.

What did Harry say?

Well, during the song, Harry said to me, "Hey, Gin. I love you."

* * *

If you review, I'll update. That seems like a fair bargain to me. 

-Jessi


	8. Stupid Cupid

Disclaimer: Yea, right.

Thanks to all my reviewers! You're the best!

This still a HarryGinny story! Don't let the first sentence fool you!

And now, the randomness continues!

* * *

_Flashback:_

_The girls all gave me dirty looks again._

_But during the song, some of them gave me more dirty looks._

_Why?_

_Because they heard what Harry said._

_What did Harry say?_

_Well, during the song, Harry said to me, "Hey, Gin. I love you."

* * *

_Someone hates me.

Not because Harry said he loves me. That was nice.

It's the fact that about three hundred girls want to murder me.

Oh, and a junior Death Eater wants to murder Harry.

But actually, what's different about that? Death Eaters always want to murder Harry.

"Please tell me you didn't just say that you want to murder me," Harry said.

Damn. Thinking out loud again.

"So you _do_ want murder me," Harry said.

What is with me and thinking out loud?

"Why do want to murder me?" asked Harry.

"Shove it, Potter. I don't want to murder you."

_Great. That's such a wonderful way to treat the guy you love._

Is this my subconcious again?

_Yes. Now tell Harry you're sorry._

I don't have to. He's smiling. And who left and put you in charge anyway?

_Your common sense retired. We had a retirement party just last week._

Oh, yeah? Well, um...

_Stop talking to me. Harry's starting to think you're crazy._

"Gin, are you okay? 'Cause you keep talking to yourself and I don't think that's healthy and..."

Damn. I hate it when my subconcious is right.

And those girls still want to murder me.

Well, if I'm going to be murdered, I might as well give them a reason to kill me.

So I kissed Harry.

But, of course, I wished to be like Cinderella. And if I remember correctly, Cinderella had to run away from the ball.

Now all I have to do is wait. I'll have a reason soon enough.

And when I finished kissing Harry I had my reason. Becuase as soon as I finished kissing Harry, all hell broke loose.

Malfoy started chasing Harry, screaming threats.

Weird. I thought Malfoy hated me. I did ruin his face and hair.

Though, how can you ruin something that was already ruined? I think he was a lot better looking after I "ruined" his face and hair.

Anyway, about three hundred witches started chasing after me. There were about five hundred girls there, but some of them didn't hear anything and weren't chasing me.

Until one idiotic girl screamed, "She kissed Harry! Get her!"

Great. Now I'm being chased by five hundred witches.

Now would be a good time for Lily and James to show up.

Lily and James were nowhere to be found.

Great. When I need them, I can't find them. And when I don't need them, they're always there.

I ran out of the room. For some reason, no one followed me.

Then, Malfoy came running out of the room with an arrow sticking out of his ass.

This better not be the work of Cupid.

"Ginny! Sweetheart! I love you!" he yelled.

I looked at him like he was crazy. Which, of course, he is.

I thought my life couldn't get any worse. But it did.

Malfoy got down on one knee and said, "Ginerva. Will you marry me?"

Um, now would be a good time for me to wake up. This can't be real. It must be a dream.

So why the bloody hell won't I wake up?

I screamed in frustration and Harry came out of the room.

"Hey, Gin. Everything okay?"

I lost my temper. "No! Everything is not okay! First, I see Ron and Hermione snogging! Then, the Ministry decides I have to marry Ferret-Face and that the guy I love has to marry freakin' Cho Chang! Then, the ghosts of your parents come and tell me that they're my fairy godparents! Then, you and my brothers go and get yourselves arrested! Then, I have to come to this damn ball where five hundred girls armed with wands chase me because you love me! And when I escape, Malfoy comes and proposes to me! I've been called Ginerva four times today! FOUR! And two idiots made me tell them that my name is Ginerva! My own subconcious makes fun of me! All of that happened today, so how the bloody hell am I supposed to be okay?"

Harry looked like I was going to kill him. He looked like he would rather face Voldemort again than deal with me.

Great. Now I feel bad.

_Then say sorry, you idiot._

Maybe I should listen to you this time. You were right last time.

_Of course I was right last time. Subconciouses are always right._

Then why do people do things wrong?

_Because they don't listen to their subconcious._

_And stop talking to me. You're talking out loud and you end of the conversation seems totally random._

What the hell? Why do I keep doing that?

_Because I made you._

WHAT?

_I'm so mean._

If you don't put me back to normal right now, I'll... I'll...

_Not so easy to threaten part of your brain, now is it?_

Shut up. I hate you.

"Why do you hate me, Gin?" asked Harry.

"Why do you hate me, sweetheart?" asked Malfoy.

"Shut up, Potter. I wasn't talking to you."

"What about me?" whined Malfoy.

"Go to hell, Malfoy."

"You still haven't answer my question. Will you marry me, Ginerva?"

What is wrong with these people? Calling me Ginerva every second of the day. It's not my fault that's my name. It's not like I could tell my mum not to name me Ginerva.

And then I realized that Malfoy had found a way to ruin his hair.

So can you really blame me for fixing it?

I turned his hair red and gold again. And this time, I made it permanant. He can either leave it like that or shave it all off.

Harry started laughing his head off.

Malfoy screamed, "MY HAIR! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!"

He should really come up with something else to say. That whole "My hair! My beautiful hair!" thing is getting old.

Malfoy ran away screaming with the arrow still sticking out of his ass.

Harry said, "That was brilliant, Gin!"

And then he kissed me.

Then Malfoy had to come of ruin it.

"Get away from her! I'm going to curse you into next week! How dare you kiss my future wife! I will kill you!" Ferret-Face screamed.

I took that as my cue to leave.

And when I left, Lily and James were standing outside, arguing.

"Why did you do that, James? You just made more trouble!"

"I had to work to get you to like me! Harry should have to work to get Ginny to like him!"

"He doesn't have to! She already likes him!"

"So he needs to fight off the competetion!"

"I still don't know why you had to hit Malfoy with an arrow!"

"That's what Cupid does! I don't see why I can't do that!"

"You're not Cupid, James! It's not your job to make people fall in love!"

"It should be!"

"But you made Malfoy love Ginny! Do you see any sense in that whatsoever?"

"Yeah! He has to win her over!"

"James! He already won her over!"

"But that's not fair! I had to win you over! Harry should have to win Ginny t--"

That was when he noticed that I was standing right there.

"Um... Hi, Ginny!" James said.

"I tried to stop him," Lily said to me.

"That's not true! You had no idea what I was doing!"

"And now you admitted it. So now Ginny can't be mad at me."

"I hate how your mind works, Lily," James said.

A few seconds later, he started screaming. "Lily! Help me!"

"You deserve it," she said.

Did you know that you can Bat-Bogey Hex a fairy godparent?


	9. When Pigs Fly

Disclaimer: When pigs fly. Too bad Harry's not real. He could charm a pig for me.

I'm sorry! I'm very, very sorry that I haven't updated! I was grounded! So, it's not my fault at all. Okay, maybe it's my fault for getting grounded in the first place. But if some guy in your class started acted like a total asshole, wouldn't you punch him in the face?

On with the story!

* * *

I woke up the next morning with a really bad headache. 

It was all because of the Potters. All of them, going around, making my life suck. Even if it's not on purpose. I mean, Harry didn't tell those five hundred girls to chase me around, but he did give them a reason to. Couldn't he find a place to tell me he loves me where he can't be overheard by five hundred witches that think they're madly in love with him. Then James has to go and make Malfoy fall in love with me. And Lily... well, Lily didn't do anything. It's the male Potters.

Yeah. Everything wrong with the world can be blamed on boys!

Too bad that didn't make my headache go away.

"GINERVA MOLLY WEASLEY, GET DOWN HERE THIS INSTANT! THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME I'VE CALLED YOU!"

That didn't help my poor head either.

James and Lily walked into the room. Well, actually, Lily walked in. James ran in, slamming the door, laughing his head off, and making a hell of a lot of noise.

One word: ouch.

Seriously. I get a headache and everyone decides to make enough noise to wake the dead?

There is no justice in the world.

NONE!

Lily handed me a pink piece of parchment in the shape of a heart.

A love note. From MALFOY.

_Dear Ginerva Molly Weasley,_

I swear, Malfoy is so dead.

_I love you. Please marry me._

Well, that was straight-foward.

_Sincerly,  
HRH Prince Draco Lucius Malfoy_

Pompous ass.

I crumbled the note and set it on fire with my wand. Lily handed me a photo.

A Muggle photo. Of a pig flying. From Harry.

There was a note written on the back.

_Dear Gin,_

_Just thought I'd let you know that pigs can fly._

_Love,  
Harry_

Um, what?

Oh, now I remember. At the Ministry yesterday, after Harry and my brothers were released from prison, I was thinking out loud and Harry heard me. I was saying something about pigs flying.

What did I say?

'Maybe Harry loves me. Yeah, when pigs fly.'

Something like that.

So...

He loves me!

You know, this day isn't that bad. Not as bad as yesterday.

I walked out of my room and immediatly wished I hadn't.

Ron and Hermione were there, practially making my future niece/nephew right in front of my eyes!

Okay. It wasn't that bad. They were just making out. They were still fully clothed, thank God.

But still. I do not want to see my brother sticking his tongue in Hermione's mouth.

And I definitly don't want to see Hermione enjoying his tongue in her mouth.

"EWWWWW!" I screamed.

Ron and Hermione broke apart. Both of them turned bright red.

"What a great way to start my day," I said. "Watching my brother make out with his best friend. Life doesn't get much better than this."

Hermione turned redder, which I didn't think was even possible. Ron just looked confused. He never could recongnize sarcasm.

Fred and George appeared. "Ron and Harry are making out? WHERE?"

Um, ew. Please tell me they didn't actually want to watch Ron and Harry make out.

"Ron and Hermione, you morons," I said. "Besides, Harry would never make out with Ron, even though Ron has been begging him for years."

"Hey!" said Ron. "I have not!"

"Don't worry, ickle Ronnikins. Your secret's safe with us," said Fred.

"And, by the way, Ginny," said George. "What makes you so sure Harry wouldn't make out with Ron?"

"Because," I said, rolling my eyes. "Harry happens to be in love with me."

Ooops. I didn't mean to say that out loud.

"WHAT!" screamed Ron. "HARRY, ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH MY SISTER?"

Harry came out of Ron's room. "Yes," he said. "Now can I go back to sleep?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" Ron demanded.

"That's a good question," Harry said. "I mean, I just love telling you stuff that makes you want to kick my ass."

Ron looked confused. Like I said, he can't recongnize sarcasm.

Harry put on his glasses. He saw me and smiled. "Hey, Gin. Did you really see Ron and Hermione making out?"

"Ew, don't remind me," I said.

Harry laughed. "Sorry," he said. "Ijust never expected Hermione to make out with someone where anyone could see her."

Ron and Hermione turned bright red again. While Fred and George laughed their heads off, Harry went back into Ron's room to escape the wrath of my brothers.

And I went to find my wand so I could do a Memory Charm.

Even though I don't know how to do one.

Which could cause me to forget everything, just like Lockheart did.

So maybe I shouldn't.

I should just gouge my eyes out instead. It's probably a whole lot safer.

Wait. That won't help at all. I just won't be able to see. I won't forget the scary picture.

Damn.

Ron deserves a Bat-Bogey Hex.

After I hexed Ron, I got my broom and went to practice Quidditch.

Harry was there.

So was a pig with wings flying around.

"That's Walter, the amazing flying pig," Harry said.

"Walter?" I asked.

"I had to name him something," he said.

"But why Walter?" I said. "Why not Bob or Billy or George or Bruce or Joe or Phillip or Jorge?"

"Jorge?" he said, raising one eyebrow.

How do people do that? Raise one eyebrow, I mean. It's impossible for me to do that.

"You know what. You should name the pig Billy Bob Jorge George Walter Bruce Joe Phillip," I said.

Harry laughed. "Hey, pig! Your new name is Billy Bob Jorge George Walter Bruce Joe Phillip!" he yelled to the pig.

Harry turned to me. He looked really nervous. "Hey, Gin. I was wondering... um... well, I really don't want to marry Cho... and they're gonna make me marry someone... so, I was wondering... will you marry me?"

I stared at him in shock. He looked even more nervous.

Oh, right. I have to say something.

"Of course!" I said.

Harry smiled and kissed me.

You know, I'm starting to like this Cinderella thing.

* * *

Review! Please? 

The epilogue will be up in a week.

-Jessi


	10. Epilouge

Hey everyone! Last chapter! Up sooner than I thought, but that's a good thing.

Thanks to all my reviewers!

This isn't in Ginny's POV. It's in the POV of a really confused relative. I think I'll call him Bob.

Bob is so confused because I don't know what actually hppens at weddings. I fell asleep at the only wedding I've ever gone to. Bob's confusion covers up the fact that I'm not sure what I'm writing.

Disclaimer: If you don't get it by now, you never will.

I almost forgot. You guys have to use your imaginations. Pretend Bill and Fleur have a five year old daughter. Pretend Tonks and Remus have a three year old son. Pretend those things are actually possible.

* * *

Where am I? 

Oh, yeah. I'm at a wedding.

Wait. Whose wedding?

Um...

Er...

Dammit! Whose wedding is this?

Oh, well. I'll figure it out sooner or later.

The groom has messy black hair, emerald green eyes, glasses, and a lighting bolt shaped scar on his forehead. He's wearing emerald green dress robes.

He looks fimilar. Who is he?

Those people standing next to him. What are they called? Best Men, or something? Well, whatever. There are five of them, all with red hair and freckles.

Where am I again?

Oh, that's right. I'm at a wedding in Hogwarts castle.

This is getting boring. Where's the bride?

There she is. Finally.

Am I related to her? Who is she?

The bride has long red hair, freckles, and brown eyes. Sh'es wearing white dress robes.

She lookes fimilar too. Do I know her?

The flower girl is about five years old. She looks like a veela with red hair.

The ringbearer is about three years old. The color of his hair keeps changing. His mum is leading him. His mum has bright pink hair.

There's only one bridesmaid. She has frizzy bron hair.

All these people seem fimilar.

Who are they?

A man came up and started talking. I stopped listening.

A little while late, I started listening again.

"If anyone has any objections, speak now or forever hold your peace," the man said.

Six people stepped forward. The man, I guess he's a priest, looked alarmed. This probably never happened before.

The priest asked each boy his name and his objection.

"My name's Ron Weasley. My sister's too young to get married."

"My name's Fred Weasley. My sister's too young to get married."

"My name's George Weasley. My sister's too young to get married."

"My name's Charlie Weasley. My sister's too young to get married."

"My name's Bill Weasley. My sister's too young to get married."

Those Weasley boys are very reptitive.

So...

The bride's a Weasley.

The sixth boy stepped forward.

"My name is Prince Draco Lucius Malfoy. Miss GinervaMolly Weasley cannot marry Prince Harry James Potter because I am in love with her."

Pompous ass.

The bride looked angry. Very angry.

She turned to her brothers.

"I may be too young to get married, but the Ministry is forcing me to. I can either marry Harry, or I can be a good little girl and marry the amazing bouncing ferret like the Ministry said. Take your pick."

The one named Bill said, "Okay. She's marrying Harry. No way in hell am I gonna let my little sister marry Draco Malfoy."

The bride smiled and pulled out her wand. She turned to Malfoy. "Draco, darling. You've messed up your hair again."

She flicked her wand and Malfoy's hair turned red and gold.

"Gryfinndor colors!" said the groom.

"MY HAIR! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!" Malfoy screamed.

The bride laughed. "If you interupt my wedding again, I'll fix your faxe for you, too."

Malfoy ran from the room, screaming.

So...

The bride's name is Ginerva Weasley and the groom's name is Harry Potter.

I thought they looked fimilar.

Six people had objections to the wedding.

And I thought weddings were boring.

The priest was talking again.

"Do you, Prince Harry James Potter of England -"

"Can't you just say 'Harry Potter'?" the bride asked.

When did the of England part get added?

"Do you, Harry Potter, take Ginerva Molly Weasley -"

"Ginny! My name is Ginny Weasley! Why can't anyone get that straight?" the bride said.

"Do you, Harry Potter, take Ginny Weasley to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do."

"Do you, Ginny Wealey, take Harry Potter to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do."

Suddenly someone screamed. She was screaming, "Won-Won! I missed you, Won-Won! Lav-Lav missed her Won-Won!"

Ron screamed, "Stop stalking me, you freak!" and ran from the room.

Where am I again?

Oh, yeah. I'm at a wedding.

Whose wedding is this again?

The bride and groom kissed and everyone cheered.

Finally. It's over.

Thank God.

And they lived happily ever after.

Wait.

Where am I?

Whose living happily ever after?

Oh, I'm so confused.

* * *

I'm done! Finally! I'm gonna write a sequel to this called Fairy Tale Ending. 

I almost forgot. Do me a favor and check out my brother's story. It'll be up soon. It's called Free At Last. His penname is morclaw. So please check out his story and review.

Review everyone! You flame, you get flamed.

-Jessi


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